TCSS 2: Flights of Fancy
by Tegan's Muse
Summary: Tegan starts to settle in at her new job, but she's also catching some flack from the boss on a more personal level.
1. Prologue

**The Tegan Chronicles Sanctuary Style 2:**

**Prologue**

In the weeks immediately after accepting the job she let Helen perform the procedure to ablate the nerves in her stump and hadn't had any phantom pain since. She'd also turned her biomechanical arm over to the resident geek, Henry, who was able to reprogram the arm so Helen, Kate, Will or himself could remove her arm if the need arose. Unfortunately the thumb reader wouldn't cooperate when it came to the Big Guy. Henry was also working on fabricating a back up arm and Helen had found someone who could replicate the seamless protective sleeve. Tegan currently had twice as many of them as she did underwear.

Since Tegan had accepted the position Helen offered her, Helen had been testing her by sending her out on simple missions. A few had even been staged with willing residents brought in from other Sanctuaries. At every turn Tegan had impressed her with her skills. Not only was she extremely intelligent, beautiful and modest to a fault, she was also strong, fast and always on her toes. She had even called Helen out for setting up missions to test her. Her level five hand-to-hand combat training came in handy before Helen had allowed her to start carrying a gun. When she tested her firing skills, she'd asked Tegan to shoot with her biomechanical hand. The results were better then Magnus herself shot with her dominant hand. What she lacked in street smarts she more than made up for in skill.

In the last week Helen finally liberated the zat gun from her safe and Tegan showed Henry how it worked. He planned to retrofit it with a renewable power source, but so far he'd been unsuccessful.


	2. Changes in Altitude

**The Tegan Chronicles Sanctuary Style 2:**

**Flights of Fancy 1:**

**Changes in Altitude**

After the staff meeting Helen watched Tegan gathering her notes. She stood quietly and walked over to the winged back chair Tegan was occupying.

Tegan closed her portfolio and looked up as Helen's legs came into view. She hated the way her eyes wanted to linger on them. She wasn't sure if Helen had spoken or not. "Sorry?"

"For?"

"Oh." Tegan exhaled the word feeling like a fool. "I thought you said something."

"Not yet." Helen smiled one of her patient and amused smiles, but it quickly faded away. "Are you alright?"

Tegan knew the question was coming. She wasn't sure if the warning had been in the smile or it's exit. "I'm fine. Why do you ask?"

The question caught Helen off guard. Over the past few months Tegan stuck with the shortest possible answers when it came to how she was, either physically or emotionally. She also had shown a penchant for dancing around questions. For her to actually open the door that wide for Helen to walk through was nice, even if a little out of character. "You seem distracted today."

Tegan let out a quick sigh. She sometimes forgot how observant Helen and Will were. Though she'd gotten better at hiding even the strongest emotions from Will. Helen on the other hand seemed to have a homing device set on it. She opened her mouth and took a deep breath, her brow furrowed slightly and she closed it, pursing her lips together.

"You can talk to me." Helen's voice was soft and inviting.

She shook her head and licked her lips. "It's nothing."

"Well if it's nothing it won't hurt to share it." Helen flashed her 'I've got all day' smile.

Tegan glanced at the fireplace suddenly finding the kindling box fascinating. "I've been here ninety days as of today."

Helen did the math quickly in her head. Some days it felt like Tegan was an old friend, and other days she was this completely mysterious being.

"I'm missing in action, but today I'll be presumed dead and all search efforts will come to a halt. The mirror will go back to area 51, and they'll probably hold some kind of stupid ceremony in my memory." She knew SG1 would have fought to extend the search from thirty to ninety days.

"Isn't that better for them? They need to mourn and move on."

"If I could have told them the day Nikola destroyed the mirror that I would never be able to see them again, I would have. I would have given anything to save them the last three months of searching and holding onto false hope."

"If you want that for them, then why can't you do that for yourself? It's been three months, it's time."

"I know." Tegan looked up at Helen. She knew she was right. She'd already accepted the fact that her people weren't here, just their body doubles were. But she hadn't allowed herself to move on and three months was a long time to grieve.

"It's just not that simple is it?" Helen's eyes held so much compassion and understanding in them. She stepped back.

"No." Tegan stood up. "It's not."

Helen surprised her by hugging her. "Keep your afternoon open."

Tegan stepped out of the embrace when Helen released her. "Are we going wabbit hunting?"

Helen smiled lightly at the levity. "You'll see."

Tegan sat next to Helen in the passenger seat and looked inquisitively at the marine who waved them through the guard shack with barely a glance inside the car. Tegan looked on curiously as they drove through a thick grove of evergreens and furs. By the time they reached the airfield Tegan had almost forgotten the marine in battle fatigues.

"You've got your own airport?" Tegan asked as they stopped.

"Not exactly." Helen put the car in park as Tegan looked out at the two fighter Jets coming out of a hangar. This is my personal airstrip and hangar, I rent the rest out to the military."

"That explains why the Marine at the gate didn't even give you a second glance."

Helen nodded with a mischievous grin pulling at her lips. "You'll find a flight suit and gear in your size in the trunk. You need to get changed into it."

It was rare Helen actually told her what to do, and even rarer still that Tegan would do what she told her to do without some resistance. She never had a problem when Helen would ask, but in this case Helen most definitely did not ask. Still Tegan didn't pause as her hand reached for the door handle. "You don't have to tell me twice."

There was something in the smile Helen flashed her, like a light bulb had just turned on, but Tegan was already out of the car and didn't pick up on it.

"Very smart looking." Helen took in the army green flight suit and combat boots, though she thought it was Tegan's confident smile that really made the outfit. "We'll need to get you a call sign, but for today it'll be Phoenix because even though it doesn't feel like it, you are rising from the ashes."

Tegan rolled her eyes. "And if I had to give you a call sign it would be 'cheesy'."

"Cheeky monkey." She mirrored the grin Tegan was giving her. "I already have a call sign, it's 'BossLady'."

The leather bomber jacket Helen was wearing made Tegan wonder if it wasn't her bedroom call sign as well.

Helen pointed to the F/A-18F Super Hornet sitting on the runway idling. "Shall we?"

"You aren't going to spew when I do an inverted loop at Mach 1.8 are you?"

"Of course not."

"That's quite enough." Helen said after the fourth maneuver. She would never admit it, but she was feeling a bit queasy.

"I thought you said you could handle it." Tegan grinned as she called back over her shoulder.

"I can, I just don't think we'll be needing to dogfight in our line of work."

"Anything could happen."

Helen knew she had a point. One of these days the UN was going to either pull it's backing or make a power play for the Sanctuary. "I've got another plane waiting for you to take up solo."

"Another plane?"

"A F-22 Raptor, it's a…"

"Single seat." Tegan knew it well. She'd even crashed one. Not that it was her fault; a mechanic who was ticked off at a General had sabotaged it. It was still her favorite plane to fly and she couldn't wipe the smile off her face with a Brillo pad if she had too. "Are you ready to land?"

"When ever you are, Phoenix." Helen didn't want to sound too enthusiastic and she hoped Tegan didn't always fly like she was following the world's scariest roller coaster track.

Helen met her on the runway as she climbed out of the cockpit after landing the Raptor. "What do you think?"

"She handle's like a charm." Tegan pulled her helmet off and shook her hair free.

"She's yours, they both are." Helen watched her give her a strange look. "Well, technically they're mine, I bought them. But right now you're the only person in the Sanctuary network who can pilot them."

Tegan nodded wondering just what she would be flying them for.

As if reading her mind, Helen pulled her wind whipped hair together in her hand and tossed it over her shoulder. "You'll mainly be doing reconnaissance in the Raptor, and maybe drop supplies via the release tanks. I've had some cargo pods fabricated to fit it. Occasionally you'll use the Super Hornet for transportation. I don't currently plan on having you bomb anything."

"That's good to know."

"Has your day improved?"

"Tenfold." She smiled from ear to ear.


	3. Monkeys and STDs

**Tegan Chronicles Sanctuary Style 2:**

**Flights of Fancy 2:**

**Monkeys and STDs**

Two weeks later Helen and Tegan were in a heated discussion as they made their way through the Sanctuary corridors. Helen walked two paces behind Tegan who didn't seem to have a particular destination in mind. "I'm sorry but this is more important."

"Get Will to help you." Tegan threw out.

"He's at a conference in Miami."

"What about Kate?" It was better than mumbling about how convenient that was.

"She can't fly a jet."

"She can't fly anything." Tegan punctuated the last word as she stopped and put her hands on her hips.

"Exactly." Magnus smirked lightly as Tegan turned to face her.

"Which of course rules out everyone but me." Tegan groaned. She was beginning to regret getting her pilot's license renewed, and even more so letting Helen pull special strings to get her re-certified in flying military craft. "One night, just one night is all I'm asking."

"It can't wait while you scratch an itch." Helen lifted an eyebrow. "It could be off the map tomorrow."

"Fine." Tegan smiled, she left her hands hang at her sides and her posture relaxed slightly. "I'll fly you down, you can pick up a helicopter and retrieve this rare Monkaloid while I fly back for a night on the town."

"I need your help capturing it. You can go out with Steve next weekend."

"His name is Richard and that's what you said last week."

"Fine, go on your date." Helen threw her hands in the air. "Let the poachers kill what could quite possibly be the last living Monkaloid on the planet, while you go find out the latest way to pick up an STD."

When Helen made snide comments like that, Tegan found it hard to feel guilty. Her prosthetic hand balled into a fist without conscious effort. "It's dinner and a movie, not how to get gonorrhea holding hands."

"Really? Then don't expect me to treat you for syphilis."

Tegan sighed.

"I'm sorry." Helen's tone changed. "I know you probably aren't the type to just jump into bed with anyone."

"No, not that it's any of your business." Tegan spit out. "I'm sure I've had fewer lovers than you have."

"I do have more than a century on you." Helen didn't want to admit it had been well over a decade since she was last intimate with anyone.

Tegan held up a single finger.

"One?"

"One person." Tegan said and turned to walk away. "I'll be ready in an hour."

Helen smiled. Not only had she just learned an intimate detail about Tegan, she'd also gotten her to do her bidding yet again.

* * *

><p>Tegan finished securing the crate in the helicopter and leaned against the door, her wet khaki tank top stuck to her like a second skin and a thin sheen of perspiration covered her entire body. Her red hair, which had grown quiet a bit over the last several months, was plastered to her neck and face, a combination of the heat and humidity.<p>

Helen held out a bottle of cold water.

"Thanks." Tegan cracked the seal on it with a twisting motion, pocketed the cap and emptied the bottle of its contents in two gulps.

"Slow down." Helen warned but it was too late.

"Are you sure you want to fly this back by yourself?"

"I don't really have a choice." Helen shrugged lightly. It was too large to hold on her lap in the Super Hornet.

"I could take it back in the Hornet and you could fly back first class."

"It won't fit."

"It will." Tegan nodded.

"What if he wakes up and gets agitated?" Helen had dealt with her share of abnormals who didn't like flying before.

Tegan watched a drop of perspiration travel down Helen's throat and disappear under the hem of her green tank top plunging between her ample cleavage. She pulled her eyes away as her stomach cramped. "It'll have less time for the sedation to wear off in the jet."

"True." Helen pursed her lips as Tegan turned and ran for the edge of the tarmac.

She just barely made it before the clear and bile tinged liquid came spurting out of her mouth and nose. It was still cold and the acid in it burned.

"Are you alright?" Helen approached.

"You tried to warn me."

"I did." Helen agreed. "You're dehydrated. I'd send you home first class if I had any other way to get that plane home."

"Jet." Tegan corrected her as she looked back at the fighter jet. "I'm fine, and trust me I've flown under worse circs before."

Helen nodded. "I'll have Henry meet you on the runway when you land."

* * *

><p>Helen walked into Tegan's room Sunday evening.<p>

"I didn't know you were back."

"Just got in."

"Nice flight?"

"Once I got in a real plane it was."

"Next time we go to the rainforest, remind me to pack bug spray." Tegan scratched at a bite behind her knee.

"Just be glad we didn't run into any giant Mayan spiders."

"How giant?"

"The little ones are the size of a humvee."

"Of course." Tegan cringed. "Why did I even ask?"

"Did you reschedule your date with Steve?"

"No." She didn't correct her because she knew Helen knew his name was Richard. "He said he had better things to do then for me to be constantly brushing him off so I can wash my hair; and that I must have the cleanest hair of any woman he knows."

"I'm sorry."

"No you're not." Tegan watched Helen flinch ever so slightly at her words, but they both knew the truth. "Quite frankly, neither am I?"

* * *

><p>AN: There is a story here on FF that was written by Arones referencing the spider size Humvees can you find it?


	4. Move On

**Tegan Chronicles Sanctuary Style 2:**

**Flights of Fancy 3:**

**Move On**

Tegan was in the sitting room on the staff floor playing around with an acoustic guitar she'd picked up for cheap at a local pawnshop. It really wasn't anything special, but it did have a nice quality tone to it.

Helen stopped in the doorway. "No plans?"

"Why? Do you want to change them?" Tegan clenched her jaw waiting for the answer.

"I don't care what you do in your spare time." Helen walked in and dropped unceremoniously into the overstuffed chair.

"Spare time?" Tegan scoffed lightly. "What's that?"

"I had no right to say what I did last Friday."

"Helen Magnus apologizing?"

"It's been known to happen. But I won't apologize for asking you to do your job. Our work is important."

Tegan nodded, for the last four days the Monkaloid had been following Tegan around like a lost puppy; although he looked more like a sunburned hairless monkey with really bad acne to her.

Tegan started playing the guitar. "I guess that means moonlighting at the Blue Ace is out of the question."

"New guitar?" Helen asked rather than answer her.

"Used, but new to me." Tegan finished tuning it and glanced back up to see Helen watching her behind a veil of weariness that clouded her eyes.

Helen closed her eyes as Tegan started playing random cords.

When she finally settled on a song she started accompanying herself. "Who knows how long I've loved you, you know I love you still."

Helen immediately recognized the less than popular Beatles song and thought Tegan did a better job singing it then Paul, who had written the song for her.

"Will I wait a lonely lifetime? If you want me to, I will."

Helen looked up at Tegan with half lidded eyes to see her look over at her as she started the chorus, which made it different than when Paul had sung it.

"Love you forever and forever; Love you with all my heart. Love you whenever we're together; Love you when we're apart." Tegan pulled her eyes away from Helen fighting the blush that was beginning to creep up her neck.

"For if I ever saw you, I didn't catch your name. But it never really mattered I will always feel the same.

"Love you forever and forever; Love you with all my heart. Love you whenever we're together; Love you when we're apart."

Tegan focused on something far behind Helen as Helen continued to watch her intently. "And when at last I find you, your song will fill the air. Sing it loud so I can hear you. Make it easy to be near you. For the things you do endear you to me. Oh, you know, I will. Oooh, you know, I will. Ooooooh, you knooow, I will."

"They wouldn't want you to." Will spoke from the doorway where he'd been standing unnoticed.

"What?" Tegan turned her head toward him.

"They wouldn't want you to 'wait a lonely lifetime.'" Will made air quotes around the lyrics.

That answered how long he'd been standing there. She wrinkled her brow. "Who?"

"Any of them." He walked in and sat on the couch beside her. It was the first time he'd really felt he could broach the subject on this level with her. "But especially the person you loved the most."

_Janet_, Tegan thought silently.

"At some point your friends, your family and even your S.O. are going to have to move on and they would want you to do the same."

Helen shifted in the chair and Tegan looked over to see blue eyes regarding her. "He's right."

"It's hard to move on when someone thwarts your every chance at anything resembling a date."

"It goes with the territory." Helen shrugged.

Will smiled at her sadly. "So you got the 'the job comes first' orientation already."

Helen gave him a cross look.

"Is that what it was?" Tegan looked from Helen to him and back.

"Yeah although she waited longer to give it to me."

"Well," Helen spoke, "You weren't trying to date Steve."

"His name is Richard." Tegan sighed. "You don't even know him."

"And you do? He sold you a pair of shoes."

"Boots, and it's not like it matters now."

"You can do better than a shoe salesman." Helen stood up. "Much better."

"I know this guy…" Will saw the look Helen flashed him. "But yeah, maybe not. He was such a dork in med school, and I think he's planning to rule the world one day."

"He's going to have a run for his money." Tegan directed the comment at Helen as she put her guitar back in its case.

* * *

><p>AN:

*I Will Lyrics by the Beatles, Christina Perri's youtube arrangement used as primary inspiration.


	5. Everyone Likes Fish

**Tegan Chronicles Sanctuary Style 2:**

**Flights of Fancy 4:**

**Everyone Likes Fish**

The next morning Helen went down to check on Sally the mermaid after Henry told her she was looking paler than normal and maybe a little green too. She rounded the corner to find Tegan sitting in a chair five feet away from the glass front to Sally's enclosure. "Henry told me she was feeling a little under the weather."

"She seems fine." Tegan stood up. "Just lonely."

Helen watched her hold up the sketchpad she had just been drawing in up to the glass.

"How's that?"

Sally smiled and nodded.

"Can you understand her?" Helen asked stepping forward.

"She's a telepath." Tegan responded as if that was the answer.

"Yes I know, but Kate and the guys can't communicate with her."

"Neither can I." Tegan shrugged. "Not through conventional means anyway."

"Put your hand on the glass." Helen nodded to Sally.

Tegan moved her sketchbook to her other hand and put her right palm flat against the glass. Sally put her left hand on the other side sandwiching the glass between them. A minute later Tegan made a face and looked up at Sally. "No I won't draw you an anatomically correct Neptune. Dolphins and starfish are the closest you're getting." She paused. "No, not him either. I don't even want to think about that. That's just wrong."

Helen watched Tegan pull her hand away.

"She's got a crush on Will."

Helen smiled. "I know."

"What?" Tegan asked when Helen stared a little too long.

Helen shook her head. "You never cease to amaze me. It took me close to a year to be able to understand her."

Tegan pulled a tin of tacky from her jeans pocket and tore the picture from her book.

"Another hidden talent?" Helen caught a glimpse of the drawing Tegan had done of Sally swimming with dolphins before she stuck it on the glass facing inward.

Tegan shrugged. "It's not that good."

"I beg to differ."

Tegan picked up her chair and looked at Sally. "I've got to go get some work done. I'll come back after dinner."

Helen stepped forward and put her hand against the glass concentrating on communicating with Sally as Tegan walked out. "Yes she is… very special."

A couple hours later Helen found Tegan in her makeshift office-slash-lab. It was an old enclosure that hadn't worked right for decades. Helen replaced the front observation glass with a wall and door. Inside there was a row of floor cabinets lining the far wall with a stainless steel countertop and sink, with overhead cabinets above it. There was a small desk with a computer set up in back corner opposite the door and in the center of the room was a small island also covered in stainless steel. Tegan was standing behind it leaning over the carcass of some rodent or other Biggie had brought in for identification.

Tegan looked up when she heard the door swing open the last little bit. She twisted her wrist until she heard a loud gratifying pop and then pulled her surgical mask up over her mouth and nose. "I think it's just a large sewer rat, but I can use the practice."

Helen watched as she picked up her eye shield. "Sally says you've not been sleeping much and that you're having nightmares when you do."

"Did she?" Tegan donned a pair of latex gloves without looking up.

"It takes longer to learn to close your thoughts off from her." Helen offered. "More visions that aren't yours?"

Tegan looked up at the question. "Didn't she tell you?"

"She would never betray a confidence, including anything she picks up that you don't openly share with her."

"While I appreciate the concern, I'm fine."

"Of course." Helen stared at her longer than necessary.

* * *

><p>"Hey, it's time for dinner." Henry stuck his head in her office on his way up.<p>

"Yeah." She said distractedly. She was typing up her autopsy report. "I'll be up in a minute."

"If you're not Magnus will sic Biggie on you."

"I'm not afraid of him."

"You should be." Henry warned.

"You made it." Helen looked up and smiled as she plated the trout Bigfoot had made.

"If I'd known it was fish night, I would have found a better hiding place." She looked at Henry.

Biggie grunted from behind her. "You don't like fish? Everyone likes fish."

"Not this everyone. I despise eating anything that lives in water."

"I can make you a steak." He surprised her with his offer.

"That's really sweet." She smiled at him. "But I'll just heat up leftovers."

"Suit yourself."

"I don't want you going back to work tonight." Helen watched Tegan scrape her mainly untouched dinner into the slop bucket.

"I just need to finish up my autopsy report. I did find some anomalies."

"And it can all wait until tomorrow."

"Fine."

Helen thought she had given in too easily.

At five minutes past midnight Helen appeared in the doorway to Tegan's office. "I thought I asked you not to return to work tonight."

"You didn't ask, you told me." Tegan clarified as her computer monitor flickered to life. "But technically it's morning."

"I honestly don't know how you made it to the rank of Major the way you follow orders."

"I" She opened her mouth then closed it. The retort that had been on the tip of her tongue was gone.

"Yes?"

"Nothing." She glanced at the screen.

"When's the last time you slept, and I mean really slept?"

"I don't know." Tegan continued to stare at the screen.

"Maybe you do need to get laid."

"Excuse me." Tegan cut her eyes back to Helen. "Not that you have any room to talk."

"Did I say that out loud?" It was really out of character even for her.

"I think you've been hanging around Tesla too much."

Helen raised a singular eyebrow. "Actually, I was just thinking it might help you sleep."

Tegan shook her head. Aside from when Helen had given her Twilight, the last time she had really slept was in Janet's arms. Come to think of it, the last time was after a wild tryst between the two of them and just before she'd left on the mission that landed her here.

Helen watched the memory register in the dancing hues of her eyes. She wished she knew what Tegan was thinking, but she was pretty sure she it had to do something with Janet.

"Well, it doesn't look like that's going to happen anytime soon."

"I wasn't suggesting you should just jump into bed with any ol' 'Steve' that comes along."

"Of course not." Tegan licked her lower lip pulling her tongue back in slowly.

Helen inhaled and straightened her back, her eyes never leaving Tegan's lips. She was glad there was over half a room and a desk between them.

"STDs and all that."

"Huh?" Helen realized she'd been staring. She hadn't been attracted to a woman since the 1910s. "Right, of course."

Tegan looked back at the screen trying to ignore the change in Helen's respirations. She was probably thinking about jumping Will anyway. Not that she hadn't given more then a few minutes thought on the same subject, and Henry too for that matter. She shook the thought from her head before she remembered how much she liked bad boys and let Nikola on the bus.

Helen watched Tegan shiver slightly before turning her complete attention to her work. She stood there watching her for several more minutes before heading back up stairs to find a good book and a hot bath. Although she was aware a cold shower would be more appropriate.

"I heard you couldn't sleep." Nikola intercepted her in the hall. "I could help."

"Nikola, grow up." Helen pushed him aside. "And leave my staff alone as well."

"What?" He feigned ignorance.

"I've seen how you leer at her." Helen narrowed her gaze on him before proceeding down the hall.


	6. Biggie's Special Tea

**Tegan Chronicles Sanctuary Style 2:**

**Flights of Fancy 5:**

**Biggie's Special Tea**

Tegan handed her printed autopsy report to Helen despite having emailed it to her, and backing it up on the main server and three offsite servers. Helen wanted hard copies of everything.

"Thank you." Helen looked up to see Tegan's stump covered in its black protective sleeve peeking out of the short-sleeved blue-gray button down she was wearing.

"No problem." Tegan shrugged and made her way to the couch as Will walked in.

"You look terrible." Will ran a hand through his hair leaving it standing on end. "You really should let Magnus give you something to help you sleep."

Tegan shook her head no and dropped down on the end of the couch closest to the empty fireplace.

Bigfoot came in carrying a tray of tea with Henry right behind him. "I made your favorite."

Tegan looked at the already filled teacup on the tray. "Peppermint?"

"Yes." He nodded.

"Thanks." She wrapped her hand around the fine china feeling the warmth seep through to her cold fingers.

"Tea?" Biggie asked Helen as she looked from him to Henry, who was entirely to intent on watching Tegan sip her tea.

"I think I'll pass." She said knowingly.

"It's Earl Grey."

"You really made this sweet." Tegan commented.

"Sorry." Biggie shrugged.

Henry sat on the opposite end of the couch. "At least it's not bitter, he sometimes over brews it."

"I think the added sugar was to cover up that fact." She took another sip as Kate came in and found a seat.

Halfway through the meeting Tegan started yawning. She leaned forward to sit the teacup on the coffee table and when she heard a clunk she let it go, leaving it balancing precariously on the edge.

"Woah." Henry reached forward and slid it back before it toppled off. When he glanced back at Tegan; her head had fallen back on the couch, her eyes were closed and her breathing had slowed. "Nice."

Biggie grunted.

"I knew it." Was all Helen said.

"She's going to hunt you two down and kill you." Will shook his head as a small grin played on his lips.

"Alright, that concludes our meeting." Helen didn't want to take a chance of disturbing her slumber.

Biggie gathered the tea tray and Tegan's cup while Helen pulled a small throw pillow and blanket out. She put the pillow on the cushion beside Tegan and draped the blanket over her.

"You're going to leave her there?" Biggie asked.

"I don't want to disturb her." Helen nodded and looked over at her desk. "I've got some paper work to catch up on."

Helen had been working diligently for the last hour when she heard Tegan groan. She looked up, her eyes narrowing on Tegan's face that was scrunched up in pain. It quickly faded and she wondered what dreams haunted her sleep, and if they were even hers.

Tegan had been thrown into a barren field, or rather dropped like a worn out rag doll on Christmas morning. She pushed to her feet patting the orange dust from her clothes. The ground was dry and cracked from drought. There were tiny sparse tufts of brown brittle grass scattered haphazardly as far as the eye could see. Above her eerie olive colored clouds hung low in the sky. They were churning, boiling, but the air around her was still and thick.

She turned when she heard movement. "Janet?"

Helen lifted her head again and watched for any signs of distress. She'd always known there was more to this Janet person than Tegan had shared.

"Where are you?" Janet asked from a few feet away.

"I'm right here."

"We've been looking for you. It's been months and our resources were cut."

"You're really Janet?"

"Yes." Janet nodded a tear trekking down her cheek making way for more that quickly followed. "I miss you so much."

"You have to stop looking for me. Stop waiting."

"Are you –" Her voice caught in her throat. "Dead?"

"No," Tegan smiled sadly. "The mirror here has been destroyed and they don't have a Stargate. There isn't a way for me to get back. You have to forget me. You have to move on."

"I can't live without you."

"Yes you can." Tegan nodded. "You have Cassie, and Sam. And you know Dana loves you."

"But they aren't you."

"I know, and I'll never stop loving you."

"You have to. If I have to move on then so do you. Forever and always, that's how long I'll love you, but you have to move on too."

"Forever and always." As she reached out for her, she watched soundless lips whisper 'I love you' as Janet disappeared.

"No!" She whimpered aloud and Helen stood.

She dropped her pen on top of the stack of paperwork she'd been tending and started toward the couch.

Before she made it there, a mournful wail escaped Tegan's lips. "Janet!"

Her heart felt like it would rip in two at the agony in Tegan's cry. She was surprised her own screams hadn't woken her. Carefully, so not to wake her, Helen slid her arm behind Tegan's shoulders and pulled her close to her chest.

"No Janet." She cried in her sleep and Helen could feel the wet tears seeping through the thin material of her plum colored blouse. "Please don't go."

Ten minutes later, Tegan sat up abruptly. "Sorry." She wiped at her mouth but it was dry, and as far as she knew she only drooled when she had a head cold. But there was a definite wet spot on Helen's plum top. "Did I drool on you?"

"No." Helen shook her head watching relief flood her face. "You cried on me."

Tegan blushed causing Helen to inhale sharply. "I think drooling would have been less embarrassing. I don't think I've ever cried in my sleep."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." Tegan fiddled with the hem of the blanket, but didn't make an attempt to leave.

Helen waited.

"Who drugged me?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You're not a very good liar." Tegan didn't even have to look at the hint of a grin on her lips to know Helen knew something.

"I didn't have anything to do with it."

"I didn't say you did."

"They're just concerned about you."

"Biggie and Henry." It was as much a statement as a question.

"Could have been Kate or Will." Helen threw out.

"But it wasn't." Tegan looked at Helen. "Will couldn't follow through with it, unless it was life or death. And Kate would have been more creative."

Helen nodded once.

"How long did I sleep?"

"Not long enough." Helen sighed and shifted slightly.

"That's not what I asked."

"Two hours."

Tegan stared off across the office.

"Will was right, you know."

"Hmmm?" She hummed thoughtfully.

"You need to let her go."

Her eyes darted to Helen's as she looked in them a little too deeply, three lifetimes of experience under her belt.

"She would want you to move on."

"We never said goodbye." It was easier than putting up some charade about how she hadn't been in love with a woman. They both knew better, and Tegan would never insult Helen's intelligence or intuition like that. She let her eyes drop to Helen's lips when she could handle the intensity of her gaze no longer. "I dreamt about her, and I don't know why but it didn't feel like a dream. She told me she would always love me, but she had to let me go. And then she was gone."

The room was so quiet she could hear the silence as it roared in her ears. Helen wanted to say something comforting, but there was nothing she could say to mend a broken heart.

"Do you think…" Tegan started and stopped.

"What?" Helen's eyes widened.

"It's stupid."

"No go on."

"Do you think it's possible to communicate across dimensions through a dream?"

"Three and a half months ago I wasn't even sure I believed in parallel dimensions, but I've seen a lot of things over the years that scientifically should be possible. So, yes I think anything is possible."

Tegan stood up with the blanket gripped in her hand and swayed slightly on her feet.

"Careful." Helen jumped up to grab her if needed.

"Head rush." Tegan explained with a small grin.

"I'll take care of that." Helen took the blanket from her grasp.

Tegan looked at her stump and blushed. "Thanks. I think I'm going to go lay down."

"That's probably a good idea."

Half an hour later Helen stepped into Tegan's open doorway to find her propped up on pillows reading one of her latest medical journals. "I thought you were going to sleep?"

"I never said that." Tegan peered over the journal.

She thought Tegan was even more hardcore then she was, if it was possible.


	7. What Dreams May Come

**Tegan Chronicles Sanctuary Style 2:**

**Flights of Fancy 7:**

**What Dreams May Come**

Helen leaned in and sighed into her shoulder. She had double-checked the restraints and made sure they weren't too tight. But with Tegan's strength she had to make sure she couldn't get out either. Of course she could always punish her if she did, but being their first time together she didn't want to resort to more painful techniques. Still old habits die-hard and she lowered her lips to her nipple biting it until she heard a pleasurable whimper escape from Tegan's throat. She moved to the other one before kissing a wet trail down her abdomen.

She inhaled the sweet musky smell and flicked her tongue across the tight pink nub and then down through the folds. She slipped one finger into the wet fleshy warmth and plunged it in as deep as it would go before adding another and yet another stretching her to her limit. Her fingers pounding in and out of her.

"Magnus."

"Hmmm?" Helen blinked her eyes and looked up to see Will staring down at her. "I'm sorry, I must have dosed off."

"Well, it is two am." He smiled. "I saw the light was still on and you didn't answer the first time I called your name. You should probably head to bed, you'll be more comfortable there."

Helen nodded and stood. She took a tired step toward the lamp on her desk.

"I've got it." He turned her toward the door.

A few minutes later she found herself standing outside Tegan's door. The cool metal doorknob burning her hand, she started to turn it and stopped. She had no right. And then she heard it; a scream that made her feel like someone had just sucked all the oxygen out of the atmosphere.

When she opened the door Tegan was sitting straight up in bed. Her respirations were shallow ragged panting as if she'd just been chased for miles by some overtly evil clown. Her eyes flashed up at Helen before the light flickered and died.

"Tegan?" Helen stepped into the room wondering if she had just woken the entire Sanctuary.

"I'm fine." Tegan fell back onto the bed, her hair plastered against a sweaty forehead.

"Bad dream?" Helen knew that was an understatement. The last time she'd heard a scream like that, come to think of it she wasn't sure she'd ever heard a scream quite like that.

"Yeah." Tegan pulled the covers back up to her shoulders and turned away from Helen.

There was just enough room for her to sit on the edge of the bed, and she wasn't going to just leave. Not after a scream that should have woken the bloody dead.

Tegan felt the bed depress at her hip and tensed her muscles to try and keep from tilting back into Helen. It didn't work.

Helen put a comforting hand on Tegan's back and felt muscles as tight as steel cords rippling beneath the skin. "Talk to me."

"You don't want to know."

"It wasn't a dream." Helen remembered Tegan telling her that when she slept memories that weren't hers haunted her dreams.

Tegan shook her head. Tonight it was different, tonight it was her memory or it started that way. A horrible memory of Nirrti whipping her until her chest and back looked like bleeding raw ground beef, and then it morphed into something dark and twisted. It was Helen hanging in her place and Tegan was holding the cat-o-nine

tails with blood dripping off them.

Helen rubbed soothing circles into her back.

"It was just a dream." Tegan sighed.

"A nightmare." Helen whispered. "You can tell me."

"I'd rather just forget it."

Helen understood. She'd had those dreams, she had even had those real life moments that you just wanted to forget happened. "Scoot over."

"What?" Tegan mumbled.

"Scoot over." Helen repeated as she kicked off her stilettos. This was highly inappropriate she knew. But she used to do the same thing for Henry and Ashley when they had woken from a nightmare. Although she'd stopped with Henry when he hit puberty.

Tegan moved over without turning and she felt Helen climb under the covers behind her and snuggle up to her.

"At least for tonight, let me protect you from your demons." Helen whispered gently in her ear.

* * *

><p>AN sorry it took me so long to post this last one. I got lost for a little bit with somethings going on. I'm currently trying to get TCSS 3 edited and improved before posting it, so please bare with me.


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